October 17th, 2010


The Explanation

Where there is a helpdesk, there will be people making shit up. And they will, for the most part, be male. The little known reason for this is that a man's penis will permanently shrink 2 millimeters every time he has to admit that he can't fix something. It is not much, but it sure adds up. So, instead of getting someone who knows something, or calling you back, he will make something up. Women can also do this, but I believe they do it just for fun. Not so with us.

Incidentally, this is also the reason why, if you tell a man about your unpleasant emotional state, he will not simply listen and empathize. Rather, he will unfailingly come up with a recipe for Fixing It. This is a dire necessity on the male side. We don't do this because we don't understand you, but we need to save our precious manhood.

It is too late for me anyway. I work in tech support and my prize is not much larger than a prune now. Save yourself, guys! Remember, it does not matter whether it is right or wrong, as long as you don't admit defeat.
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